I suppose that's a positive that comes from such a solemn event...
One of few.
I first met JT decades ago when he married an absolutely wonderful person. I did not know him, but I knew he had to be a quality person for her to choose him, and everything that I learned from him and about him since only confirms those initial impressions. The last few years were tough on him as his health deteriorated quickly until, at the end, there was just no more fight left. My heart breaks for my friend and her family.
JT was a creative...an artist who worked in creative fields all his life. When our oldest son was a toddler, JT cast him in a short film. I have great respect for those who don't just think about creating new art, but actually do it. What I didn't know about JT was after graduating college, he moved to New York City and worked in several off-broadway productions. How I would have loved to know that, to be able to spend an hour or two just to ask what that was like. I guess that conversation will have to wait.
It reminded me of two other funerals I attended, one in person, and one over the internet. Years ago, a writer who mentored literally thousands of writers and who helped inspire millions of written words passed. It devastated the local writing community. A speaker at his funeral--I believe it was a brother, but I could be wrong--talked about how my friend worked as a butcher in his younger days. I would have loved to talk to him about that. My mother worked in a butcher shop for decades to support our family after my father passed away. I felt sad I didn't get a chance to ask him about those experiences.
The other funeral happened last year when my supervisor and friend passed away. I listed to his brother talk about Darren's love for wrist watches. I had no idea. I have so many watches stowed away in drawers and boxes...most of them inoperative, but had I known, we could have talked about watches when we met each month for my evaluations. On the day of the funeral, this small fact of my friend made me miss him even more.
The optimist says one can find good in any situation. Optimists should add that, though possible it's sometimes difficult to see the good in some things. I'm thankful that I knew these incredible men, hence, the good. Each time, after hearing of things I wish I knew before they passed, it opened my eyes that I should be less selfish, less self-centered and get to know people better. Even though I can't know everything, I'm trying to know more.
And that's a good thing.
